Here’s why this simple advice often fails — and how to make it actually help. " ℂ ount to ten” is one of the most common things we’re told, or tell ourselves, when we’re upset. Along with other versions like take time out, or breath.  It’s part of a wider message: that when we’re anxious, angry, or overwhelmed, we should calm ourselves down. Especially when it shows, when we’re visibly angry, panicked, or not in control. The expectation is to regulate ourselves quietly, efficiently and...

From Therapy to Daily Life I’m a psychologist who trained in the world of psychodynamic therapy, where therapists stayed quiet, non-directive, and reserved.Over time, I moved beyond that approach – combining depth and insight with something more practical, active, and accessible. In these blogs, I share tools, ideas, and ways of thinking that have helped me, my clients, and the people around me – both in therapy and in everyday life. These posts are grounded in experience, and informed by...